Weekend was great but too short. Friday night I saw coffee & cigarettes which boasts an amazing cast of Tom Waits, Bill Muway (IN JOKE), Iggy Pop, White Stripes & laods of other guys. It's a series of minuets based around the theme of coffee AND Cigarettes. The first half I found extremely boring - but then again i do have a very low attention span - the second half was really really good & funny, Bill Muway scene with the Wu Tan Clan was just awesome. Anyway - gogo see it, it's bound to be better than Alfie, right?

Why remake Alfie? How are you going to improve on it?

Are there any special effects?

NO

Are there any Matrix style camera shots?

NO

Is it going to be animated by Pixar or something?

NO

Ah right - I see, so you're going to change the LOCATION it was filmed in & cast a load of twats in it - riiight, I thought so. Well, you guys go without me, I'll wait until I'm extremely bored & depressed & get it on sky box office in about 2 years OR when I'm round my mates new girlfriends house who has absolutely no taste in films or ANYTHING & has decided to hire it - OR MAYBE, one of my mates will get given it at work for some reason & then I'll have to sit through it.

And then...

So after that I went round to my mates new house In some fucking wasteland in West London near Kensal Rise / Ladbroke Grove some area like that. I always slag off west london, it was actually prety nice and the flat was GORGE! really roomy & they had a roof gardem! Damn that's a good thing.

So we spent most of the night watching Big Train & getting really stoned.

We must have seemed like the worst drinkers ever, we bought all these Budvars, me and John had a sip out of one each & left them. The next morning - all the Sol's we'd put int he freezer had exploded and there was a beery sludge all over someones ice cream.

Never let a stoner do a drinkers job.

SO - next day, portabello market which is really good, loads of junk there. Bought another rainbow top.

Back to johns, had a big smoke on the roof. Weather was amazing, proper winter sun & warm enough for a tee shirt.

THEN - Stu just happened to be at his mates teabag near by, so I went there for more smokes. You see all this section is really brief cause I can't remember any of it cause I was SO STONED.

This bit I remember though: there was a party happening in Hackney - I made my way over & got to hackney for about 10.30 on the number 30 bus.

Oh shit - I left my bag on the cocking bus! (My excuse for this is that I already had a carrier bag on me so the weight was fine) RAN like a bastard after the bus - lost it. Went to hackney bus garage - they said "Nahhh - this is Arriva, you want Stagecoach, in hackney WICK" sounds nearby but it's like 3 miles away. Get on the 30 behind - she radios everyone - let's me wait on the bus while it terminates. bout 5 minutes later she gets a call back & someones got it!! She says it's on it's way to hackney wick bus garage. I decide to go right then as it has all my weed in it. Get on the 30 behind THAT - as it's going to hackney wick - shame is it's not going to the bus garage. I get off in hackney wick & try and get a bus that's going to the garage, none of them are!! Lots of black cabs going the other way but none of the cunts are stopping, probably cause they can see I'm going the wrong way. one stops evetually - takes me to the garage, the bus with my bag on it isn't due back for an hour and a half!!! Get the cab back to hackney central for the party - £20!! Got my bag back the next day, luck really seeing as it had my phone, gear, cheque book, PASSPORT, work pass etc etc in it - what a fool, what a fool I am.